Another women’s day just passed by! Lot of attention in media – everyone did their bit! The private sector, the public sector and the individuals – all played their part in promoting the awareness about celebrating womanhood! Nice messages were pouring into my whatsapp, twitter, fb and mails. Everyone seemed to be enthusiastic about sharing their wishes with me – colleagues, friends, family…. and I reciprocated. In addition, I did my bit by joining a walkathon organized at work for the sake of girl child. It was a win-win for me – I could do a long walk and also make sure that I did my bit on women’s day.
And then, this interesting conversation happened during the walkathon. There was this senior person from a well established industry association which aggressively promotes “Diversity and Inclusivity” and in that context women. This gentleman was sharing his views on women leadership and the need to support women during their child bearing years. Typical of someone who is passionate about what they do, this gentleman was describing and analyzing the various initiatives to support women in IT sector.
During the course of this passionate conversation, he highlighted that employers should appreciate the needs of the women during pregnancy period also. He gave an example – if a women has morning sickness, she should be given the option for flexible timing. I was mentally absorbing this fact of including pregnancy period also to provide flexibility to women and wondering what it means to run a project and accommodate these requests – in reality, IT sector struggles a lot to provide meaningful flexi timing even post pregnancy as the work demands overlap timing with US time zones.
And suddenly he adds the spice ” you know, I was told that it is the senior women who are not very supportive to implement these small changes to take care of the women’s needs. They say, “we have gone through the pregnancy period and managed work without any concessions. Why can’t the current generation do this?’ That is where people say that men are different and take care of women better”. My thoughts were stilled and i was taken aback for a minute – alas, once again, i was reassured that women never get it easy!
My experience tells me to subscribe to the concept of “when going gets tough, the tough gets going” . With this new perspective shared by this gentleman, my subscription can easily be construed as a senior women not appreciating the tough situation which a junior women is going through??!!! Am aghast – should i patronize the younger generation to be a considerate senior or continue to goad them to cross over tough situations by being tough?? So, patronizing women is what they call as taking care of women??!!! where will they get this right?!
These…. Idiosyncrasies of being a woman!!
I doubt whether it is anything unique – most of us keep experiencing this – a song getting suddenly stuck into ourselves and never leaving us for some time. While i frequently flip around Carnatic music and contemporary regional Tamil movie songs, it is quite some time that i experienced this…. Suddenly, i have three songs stuck in me…
It all started with “Bho Shambo” – Dayanad Saraswathi’s impressive creation rendered by Sudha – the moment i heard it, i knew i need to hear it again and again and again!…..this is to the extent that i woke up to this song and listened to it through the day and slept over this song …this song was nostalgic – reminded me of those spiritual moments one experience growing up in the mystic temple town of Shiva – Chidambaram! And to some extent, the obsession on Shiva and the mystic experiences of the south indian ancient temples stays in me… (is that why i liked Shiva Trilogy of Amish?)
When I thought, i am all done with my song of the month, at an unexpected time of the day, another song jumps into me (i think i asked for it!!!)- a regional contemporary song from the tamil movie Paiyya- it still rings inside me even when i write this post – this is again a very unique experience considering i have heard this song in the past and did not give it much of a thought than the nice visuals. Unlike the song of 80s, the current songs are more dominated by the background music than the lyrics and i sure did not listen into the lyrics before. But then, when a song is destined to be getting into you, it somehow gets you at whatever state you are in – it is like another life incident which you are destined to go through! ” Better late than never!!” – the scripts are from na.muthukumar – the way this song got stuck now with a focus on the script is extremely surprising and surreal…
And when i really was all done for this season, jumps the other powerful script of Vairamuthu - from the Tamil movie Ravanan – so very pragmatic and honest !
While i really have to wait on whether I will get over these songs sooner, I am not complaining at all!! I am also 50% through in learning the songs and scripts!!
OBSESSED AND LIKING IT !! :) :)
On a dull Saturday afternoon, I compulsively was checking twitter, though ended up checking my inbox (established symptoms of OCD, I suppose!) – and then I saw this note from Shiva “Is this referring to you? – http://www.youthconnectmag.com/2014/09/27/13-rare-personal-stories-about-rahul-dravid-will-make-your-day-today/” – It indeed took me just a second to realize what this was about….and it was a squeaky feeling to read about yourself as “one Mrs.Srividya Ram!”
Nevertheless, I was thrilled that someone actually read it and referred it!! Later i realized, that because of this reference, the blog had booming statistics for a day! So, I am now wondering if i should thank the youthconnectmag or the simple humble real life hero for inspiring me to write this note ?
I am in general lost when everyone keeps discussing about new year resolutions – Being brought up at a small town in a traditional orthodox family, new year for us was another day in which we woke up early as it falls on the Margazhi month of Tamil calender, make sure the Kolam (rangoli) on the outside of the house is grander than usual, visit the temple and wait for that traditional sweet dish of payasam(Kheer) or Sakkarai pongal to be served for breakfast or lunch at home. Then we just continue with our life..we do what we have been doing the previous day!
So, when I hear “new year resolutions”, “reflections of the year that passed by”,”partying on the new year eve”,etc – I just end up in a catch up mode…thinking hard on how I am supposed to handle these as a matured individual who lives in one of the happening metropolitan city now!. And then another year passes by with me wondering ….
Just when i was completely convinced about my views (lack of) on new year resolutions and past year reflections, I got bumped into a webpage listing the four zen quotes…and bingo, I know that I am SIMPLY ZEN when it comes to handling my new year!!!
Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water
Sitting quietly, doing nothing, spring comes, and grass grows by itself
If you walk, just walk. If you sit, just sit; but whatever you do, don’t wobble
When hungry, eat your rice; when tired close your eyes.
And incidentally, i am now completely caught up with the rest of the world and can talk about the new year resolutions and past year reflections in a simple zen way!! :) :)
Before new year, live your life. After new year, live your life
Sitting quietly, doing nothing, new year comes and you experience life by living and being yourself
If you do something, just do it. Don’t wobble and question too much
When learning, learn it all; When living, give it all
On a serious note, i am in complete agreement of the original zen quotes and believe it is a simple strong message for everyone to carry through every day of every year they live – including the new year day!. For those who are interested to read in details – here is the link – Four confusing zen quotes.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!
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Singer – Janani Ram
Done well for a début!!!…. and she is confident enough to ask me to publicise this too!! :) :) so, here we go!!
White lips, pale face Breathing in snowflakes Burnt lungs, sour taste
Light’s gone, day’s end Struggling to pay rent Long nights, strange men
And they say She’s in the Class A Team Stuck in her daydream Been this way since eighteen But lately her face seems Slowly sinking, wasting Crumbling like pastries And they scream The worst things in life come free to us Cause we’re just under the upper hand And go mad for a couple grams And she don’t want to go outside tonight And in a pipe she flies to the Motherland And sells love to another man It’s too cold outside For angels to fly Angels to fly
Ripped gloves, rain coat Tried to swim and stay afloat Dry house, wet clothes
Loose change, bank notes Weary-eyed, dry throat Call girl, no phone
And they say She’s in the class A Team Stuck in her daydream Been this way since eighteen But lately, her face seems Slowly sinking, wasting Crumbling like pastries And they scream The worst things in life come free to us Cause we’re just under the upper hand And go mad for a couple grams And she don’t want to go outside tonight And in a pipe she flies to the Motherland And sells love to another man It’s too cold outside For angels to fly
An angel will die Covered in white Closed eyed And hoping for a better life This time, we’ll fade out tonight Straight down the line
And they say She’s in the Class A Team Stuck in her daydream Been this way since eighteen But lately her face seems Slowly sinking, wasting Crumbling like pastries They scream The worst things in life come to free us And we’re all under the upper hand Go mad for a couple grams And we don’t want to go outside tonight And in a pipe we fly to the Motherland And sell love to another man It’s too cold outside For angels to fly Angels to fly To fly, fly For angels to fly, to fly, to fly Or angels to die
Songwriters SHEERAN, ED
It definitely was an important day for me to remember – it became the MOST important day – the three unexpected questions in the unexpected situation from an unexpected person made it a superlative day! I will continue to wonder on why I became so lucky today to be aware of these questions and answers.
It sounds very cryptic, but what I experienced today was indeed cryptic at that time. It took time for me to appreciate that it was a unique happening and one of those significant times which I need to remember my entire life.
Barring all the details, here are the three questions and the answers – these made me feel connected with the universal soul which is always prevalent and waiting for me to acknowledge its presence.
Question 1: Do you know that everyone who is born in this world has to die one day?
Answer 1: Yes
Question 2: Do you think someone who suffers a lot due to a physical ailment or with a terminal illness will feel free and happy that they are dying?
Answer 2: They might be relieved of the physical pain and may be happy that they are getting free of it. They still would have enjoyed even that time of physical ailment as they could spend those extra time basking in the attention of their loved ones, being aware of the affection they shower on them.
Question 3: Do you think only the physical body goes away and the soul is still looking out for their loved ones?
Answer 3: Yes, the death is only physical – the soul stays and looks out – that is when you connect with the universe
Category – Drama-Romance ; Rating – 3.5 ; Comment – Taking care of those who need that care is an esoteric experience in itself!
A lazy Sunday evening and aimless channel surfing – I ended up watching “Adam” for an hour and half…a heartening realistic romance drama. It was a realistic ending with big emphasis on pragmatism!
The theme is an underlying romance between the budding writer and an Aspergers , For those, who is new to the term Aspergers,can read it out here…The movie tries to define love – love is to whom you may feel connected and about what.
Nevertheless, the challenge is always in the difference it makes when you know you are being loved Vs being in love. No doubt that being in love is a great feeling, but I read somewhere that the most powerful force in a woman’s life is the need to be appreciated, loved and cherished for what she is… – that kind of laid the foundation on why Beth feels that way…
What caught my attention in the movie is the challenges the caretakers of Aspergers go through – while it gives a great satisfaction to manage someone who has aberrations at psychological level (there are so many undefined mental states outside Aspergers, some even undetected!) it is so tough on an individual – there are millions and millions of those individuals around this world who go through those emotions and pursue towards the greater goal of taking care of their loved ones…and many-a-times without any recognition. This movie is a dedication to those lovely souls of mankind who care for others…God bless!
Everything is oxymoron, from every perspective
‘Absolutely unsure’ and in a ‘calm storm’
A ‘real dream’ which is ‘attractively distractive’
And a ‘true illusion’ which is ‘out of norm’
Still, is an interesting journey to a ‘definite mystery’ destination,
‘Focussing to defocus’ on the ‘perfect imperfection’
‘Consistently changing’ to ‘connect the disconnect’ with the cosmic soul
‘Experiencing inexperience’ and living the ‘illogical logic’ which is in ‘chaotic control’!
- Author – Paulo Coelho
- Eleven minutes – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paulo_Coelho
- Category – Non Fiction
- My rating – 4 on 5
So, why did i pick this book up ? I want to believe that it is another incident where the soul of the universe always shows the path … when you seek answers, you realize that the answer seeks the seeker!
I have been thinking about what is right & wrong relationship and what works & fails in human relationships – result of few counselling assignment at work – I end up listening to the younger generation’s complex personal relationships when it overlaps with professional environments – complex relationships with the first circle of family, relatives, friends, colleagues, neighbours – how relationships change over time and why relationship is all about how you feel about the other person – why everything is fair in love and war – and why there are no rights or wrongs – and why the most important thing is related to heart and not to anything physical – and why the society needs a framework in which physical relationships had to be given more importance over everything else!
At the outset, from my perspective, it can be a bit of a sticky book to refer in a conservative society (it can be even offensive to some!) – this book uses”not-so-conservative” but realistic characters/ situations to explain relationships. If you appreciate Paulo Coelho’s spiritual perspective, you will find those all over this book – you will believe that there is this universal soul which each one of us are part of and the answer seeks the seeker. The story revolves around the life of a young women who seeks answers – this book will resonate with those who have the ability to appreciate the human nature and the universal fact that both right and wrong co-exists, both evil and good co-exists and the final realization that there is nothing called right or wrong and nothing belongs to us.
Few of the quotes which i want to remember…
- She also noted that she associated love with the person’s absence than with their presence
- Freedom only exists when love is present
- The person who gives him or herself wholly, the person who feels freest, is the person who loves most wholeheartedly
- The great aim of every human being is to understand the meaning of total love. Love is not to be found in someone else, but in ourselves; we simply awaken it. But in order to do that, we need another person
- She knows this love was impossible, and yet expecting nothing, she could nevertheless have everything she hoped for from that particular stage of life
- Does the world want me to take “no” risks, to go back where I came from because I did not have the courage to say YES to life?
- Sometimes you no second chance and that it is best to accept the gifts the world offers you
- Anyone who has lost something they thought was theirs forever finally comes to realise that nothing really belongs to them – And if nothing belongs to me there is no point wasting my time looking after things that are not mine; it is best to live as if today were the first (or last) day of my life
- Dreaming is very pleasant as long as you are not forced your dreams into practice.That way, we avoid all risks, frustations and difficulties and when we are old we can always blame other people – preferably our parents, spouses, children – for our failure to realize our dreams
- The true experience of freedom – having the most important thing in the world without owning it
- Time exists in two dimensions – it can be so quick or so slow – depending on one’s state of mind
- I will at last have gained one happy day in my life, considering the way world is, one happy day is almost a miracle
- The universe only makes sense when we have someone to share our feelings with
- Passion makes a person stop eating, sleeping, working, feeling at peace. No one wants their life to be thrown into chaos. That is why a lot of people keep that threat of passion under control (Keeping passion at bay or surrendering blindly to it – which of the two attitudes is least destructive?)
- Desire is not what you see, but what you imagine
- Could I buy back a few hours of my life? We keep putting up with horrible people,waiting for that right moment to arrive, postponing the realization of dreams
- When I had nothing to lose, I had everything. When I stopped being whom I am, I found myself. When I experienced. humiliation and submission, I am free
- What thrilled her about the bird was his freedom, the energy of his wings in motion, not his physical body
About men and women
- All girls are looking for one of the three things – adventure, money or husband
- I was unfaithful and.so were they, just like any other normal couple
- Resonates with any woman – there are three inside any women – innocent girl, femme fatale and understanding mother
- Men always take fright when a woman says “I need you” (i think it works the other way when it comes to patriarchical society – men want women to be dependent??)